(By Austin Gardner)
The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. Titus 2:3-5
I. Remember that the people where you will be serving will see you as their pastor’s wife!
A. Great Responsibility as the pastor’s wife.
1. You are responsible for the growth of the ladies in your church and ministry
1. Teach them the spiritual lessons that they should learn
2. Teach them how to live at home
3. Teach them how to treat their husband and children
4. Teach them how to serve others
2. You need to help the ladies so as to protect your husband and his testimony.
Genesis 20:16 – “And unto Sarah he said, Behold, I have given thy brother a thousand pieces of silver: behold, he is to thee a covering of the eyes, unto all that are with thee, and with all other: thus she was reproved.”
1. You are his veil or covering; his separation from other women.
2. Keep an open relationship with your husband. No secrets, no locked doors
3. Protect your family life and testimony
B. Everyone will be watching you and looking up to you.
1. They will learn how to treat their husband from the way you treat your husband
2. They will learn how to treat their children and how to raise their children from the way you do.
3. They will learn how to dress from the way you dress
4. They will learn how to dress their children from the way you do things
C. Be transparent
1. Do not make them think that you are something that you are not
2. Be open about how you deal with your problems
3. Learn how much to say and when to say it
4. Even though you are transparent you do not want to lower yourself to their level to gain their friendship, let them come up to your level
D. Your transparency will cause them to speak more openly with you of their problems
II. Teaching the ladies and children in the church
A. In the beginning there will probably only be 2 teachers in the entire church, your husband and you
B. Do not do things that those who follow you will be unable to do
1. You can teach all the Bible because they will be able to
2. Do not spend money to the point that the lady who takes your class will never be able to live up to what you do
3. Do not use decorations etc. that cost more than the church and ministry will be able to provide
4. Do not give prizes and/or, even coffee and tea if it is above what they will be able to do when you aren’t there or you will set them up to fail.
C. How to have a ladies meeting
2. Devotional or Bible study
3. Prayer requests and prayer time
4. Talk about how to get the ladies involved in the ministry
D. Children’s ministry
1. First children’s ministry and class
2. Children’s church
3. Teach others how to help in the classes
III. Training other ladies to take your place
A. Begin by giving them small responsibilities and see how they do
B. Let them do the memory verse, or song etc and then gradually add to it
C. You and your husband will probably want to have a weekly workers meeting where you meet with them to teach them how to do the ministry
D. Always use as many people as you can in the ministry so that all go along learning
E. Your goal is for them to take the entire ministry
F. Be careful not to dump it all on them until they are ready
G. It is like raising children
1. Do not just expect them to know
2. Teach them
3. Walk through it with them
4. Gradually let them take over
H. Never do things in the ministry that the people can not handle when you are gone.
1. Spending too much
2. Having too much
3. Remember if you do you will just be setting them up to fail
- IV. Modesty
- It has to be their conviction and desire. You can not force it on the ladies of your church
- Teach them by your example
- Be careful about splits, low tops, tight fitting clothes, etc. Have your husband check your dress if you have any doubts.
- Be careful how your children dress. You have now become the leaders of the ministry. Everything you say and do and what your children say and do will become teaching about how to live, do and be.
- V. Godly example
- It is the key to it all
- First for your children and husband
- In how you pray and read your Bible
- In how you go soul winning
- In how you attend church
- In how you give
- In how you treat your husband and children
- In your attitude in the services
- In how you serve others